That Is Where

That is where I am today, September 14, 2018.

I came to the conclusion this morning I, cannot do this thing called being a Christian! I do not have it in me. I am unable to go on.

If I am going to make it - God is going to have to do it in me; for me; to me!

I have repented, I’ve confessed; I’ve taken up my cross; I’ve followed as closely as any human can! I’ve made Him Lord and I still fall short. My besetting sins are still there; and more darkness is revealed daily in my heart. 

The dry, heaviness is almost oppressive.

I have a moment between clients, and I review my memories on Facebook; and EVERYTHING changes. Today is my 4 year Anniversary and I almost missed it! The encouragement the post brings floods my heart with joy!  My Father fills me with its His love and I know I’m right where I’m supposed to be. 

This morning, 9/15 - my Scripture reading begins with:  “Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:”Philippians‬ ‭1:6‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Yes, He’s doing His work in me! And there will be other days, like yesterday, when I will feel the darkness encroaching and the enemy will whisper how futile my efforts are. Then God will once again remind me, through His Word that the devil is a liar; he’s already defeated and I’ve been bought with a price! I’m no longer my own - I’m His! 

“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.” Psalms‬ ‭23:1-6‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Even so - MARANATHA